I dont think that without your support I can make it. 16. Achieving your goals will help you stay motivated, inspire you to set and achieve more, and increase confidence. It will also help to give you a boost of confidence. Now whether its romantic or a deep friendship is a different question. Reading the Parent Effectiveness Training book, or attending a PET course, will help develop positive and respectful parent-child relationships, and explore alternatives to praise. 4. Go To Homepage. If someone calls you boring: "Yeah, and what makes you so exciting?" Nothing,. Last week, I went back to my college homecoming without my wife. I think that the phrase really bothers me, because its like saying, Wow, I didnt think you were good enough to ever achieve -insert whatever here.- My fiance said it to me last night while I was doing the dishes. Whatever I did, I just did it for our friendship, Bro. So thank you, mom and dad! ". 6. For what? I think children want simply to be accepted and respected as themselves. Last Updated on February 28, 2023 by Ketan. A parent might say this to a child, perhaps. Who is saying this to whom? Im so happy to have you in my life, thanks! Someone elses pride in you does not usually translate to pride in yourself. Rather, relationship skills where we communicate respectfully by listening, by positive I-Messages, by problem solving with our child, will help ensure our children feel connected and valued, and provide our children with a sense of emotional safety. She only ever said it once but it has stuck with me forever: Suddenly I found myself questioning my rather lame Im thrilled for you. . But only emotionally intelligent people understand why. If there is a mentor relationship, fine, but when the relationship is supposed to be about equals, Sajeev Rajan This topic came to mind because I recently saw a friend / mentor and told him about a meaningful professional accomplishment. Larissa is passionate about the skills taught in Effectiveness Training. 2. Be proud that you are here. Originally Published: March 28, 2018. momcilog/E+/Getty . Continually acting to seek the approval of a parent is onerous for a child. http://pbskids.org/rogers/songLyricsImProudOfYou.html. It is a feeling of relief and it was all worth while you bringing them up properly. Second, he must know you well. What if you really are proud of the person? A Summer Like No Other - Bushfires, Fear, Famly, Hope and Change, Preparing To Say Goodbye Even As I Hug Hello, When I Realised That Being A Parent To An Adult Is Different To Being A Parent Of A Child, Setting Limits Sets Limits On Children Learning to Discipline Themselves, Learning to Take The Back Seat As A Parent, As My Child Moves To Adulthood, Am I Treasuring The Moments? She was very rude and grouchy with me and reluctantly corrected her errors after I asked the manager to get involved. But one doesn't want to say that they're not proud of their country if they're looking to lead it. Talents Compliments. Youll feel mad and resentful. What would replace this oh-so-common parenting expression? Next course: We hope to run a face to face course beginning in early May, 2023. When someone says Im proud of you, they are expressing their admiration and respect for you and that can be a powerful thing. 2. Here are some examples of what you shouldn't say to someone on their sober anniversary. Ive been lurching between How can you be proud of someone elses children? but then challenging that with But then as we do both have a close relationship with her we probably have had some influence on how shes turning out . Your email address will not be published. . She is an accredited and highly experienced P.E.T. If these 10 phrases come up often, they're signs he doesn't want a relationship with you, and you should move on with someone who can be the person you deserve. When your partner is mad at you, your flirty responses to I hate you will certainly make them laugh. No, I am more proud of you, too. The best thing to give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent, tolerance; to a friend, your heart; to your child, a good example; to a father, deference; to your mother, conduct that will make her proud of you; to yourself, respect; to all others, charity. Notify me of follow-up comments by email. Isnt she elevating herself above me to oversea my behaviors to make sure I was a good little girl? Express your own feelings of appreciation and gratitude. Later, I saw her in a restaurant and apologized for balling her out in public. Friend: "At least you have a job or daughter.". By being proud of me that person shares their mind and soul with my mind and soul and includes me in a certain extended period of that persons life. I wanted to know whether or not I was overreacting.He had no hand in my achievements and since he was the one who caused me those problems, I feel he has lost every right to use that phrase with me. (a short read). 2. We laughed a lot and re-lived some old memories. What does it mean when a woman says she's proud of you? I had a lot of this type of treatment in that small community. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When someone tells you that they are proud of you, not only are they impressed by something you did and who you are, but they also want others to know it. 4 . It may be a taunt from them to do something unusual. They often tell each other they are proud of one anothers achievements and they all know its genuine. Saying, Im proud of you, is a great word and its an expression from the heart. My friends tell me that rather often so like once every month or so, which I think is a lot, if you say it more often you'll take it for granted for sure. And guess what? My native language is not English, but I have fallen into the unfortunate (for somethings) of social netwoks, like facebook. Thanks for all the interresting comments and opinions on how people use the phrase Im proud of you. 2. Instead of acting out of rage over . If youve finally graduated or youre the first one who got an A + in your entire family, your parents express how proud and happy you make them. You worked so hard, you really deserve that job! On the one hand, you're thinking, "He says I'm amazing," and you know he's not wrong. My mother said it to me when I graduated from college and I will never forget it. Sometimes a simple change of scenery might help you to stop thinking negative thoughts. That way, all they have to do is show up. Be proud of who you are. When you respond to someones words of admiration with gratitude, youre showing that you value and respect them. "), Friend: "I'm proud of you for being brave and standing up to your boss", As the friend who has found that courage, is this statement something you would appreciate? Yes, I'm sure you've come across "me too" in such situations, but it's very often ambiguous, or sounds arrogant. but with my Mothers words of wisdom always echoing. Its really a way of saying I am really the one who is special, Im the boss.and what it deserves is not thank you but rather, well kiss my ass you condescending bastard..get a lifethis proud of you nonsense is also related to people who have to say WELL GOOD FOR YOU when doing something mundane..like, someone catches me reading a book in publicoh, you are readingWELL, GOOD FOR YOU!! For Stein, the worst compliment is hearing: "You've lost soooo much weight! We all have people in our lives who make us feel special, appreciated, and respected. So, the next time someone says Im proud of you, remember to take the time to think about how you want to respond. 1 y. But this seems less common. Home / How Do I Respond To Im proud of you? I googled a sentence on this topic to see if anyone had written on it (hoping they had). Well, that means theyre impressed, happy, and overjoyed with what you did, achieved, or say something. Well, in that case, you should be proud of yourself, too. My boys are all each others fan club and its marvelous. The best way to do this is to express your own feelings of appreciation and gratitude for their words. Usually friends say "I'm so happy for you" or "Really nice job!" It makes us feel seen, understood, and appreciated. Thats something for a parent to say or a parental figurebut only occasionally. If parents don't 'approve' of their child, then they disapprove. 5. 26. Even if it's true, he says, "I don't want to think that I was walking around for a long time looking like hell.". I felt great to know he as proud of me, especially after he had read my term report cards in high school. thats a case of someone doing one-upmanship. Consequently I now cringe every time I hear the term being used out of context . Private face-to-face sessions and course not available at this point. As your friend I want you to know that there is nothing I wouldn't do for you. Click to share on LinkedIn (Opens in new window), Click to share on Twitter (Opens in new window), Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window), Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window). We learn from every step we take. What does it mean when someone tells you that they are proud of you? 4. Most of the time you spend together is in the bedroom. All rights reserved. 14. Proud Boys chairman Enrique Tarrio poses with a Proud Boys member at a rally in Delta Park in Portland, Oregon, on September 26, 2020. He may not have expected you to be qualified for the job. Well also discuss the power of words, the benefits of responding with gratitude, and how to show appreciation to others. Someone who credibly says "I'm proud of you" usually has two characteristics. Try these new and funny excuses to ask for money from your parents or your family. Second, he must know you well. I think I instinctively recognized that the balance of power had somehow been upset, but couldnt put my finger on it. Hearing those words can make us feel seen, understood, and appreciated. For many of us, hearing this phrase is like a warm hug. Image used under license from Shutterstock, Larissa Dann. You have overcome something you may not had confidence in yourself to succeed. God being what He is, at once moral and all-powerful, the immoral life is doomed to overthrow, whether the immorality consist in grasping rapacity, proud self-aggrandizement, cruel exaction, exulting triumph or senseless idolatry. It felt great, and as he falls into both of the categories above, was fully appreciated. Without you, I couldnt do it. I was talking about this statement Im Proud of you to a friend.I was annoyed about someone saying they were proud of me who barley knows me. Believe me when I tell you that it is not meant so kindly elsewhere. Looking for some extra money from your parents? For what? If you want to reply saying you're proud of the person saying he's proud of you, the only correct answer out of those four is "I'm proud of you too". Im so glad that youre there for giving me support. I am trying very, very hard not to implode. the person who says that is actually talking about themselves, not about me, and by saying that is drawing the recognition away from me towards themselves. I was very irritated and angry. 9. Ive had multiple people tell me theyre proud of me like my parents, grandparents, elders but it just doesnt mean anything to me, I dont have any emotional response from any of them and my response ends up being ok or yup. John decides to replicate his painting (for the reward of praise, not for his own sense of improvement and competence), and looks up at his mother with rapturous expectation. Your email address will not be published. 3. In the South, people are proud of you if they know you. "Scorned ex-girlfriends are the worst. I am livid because a couple of arrogant, condescending people who had been known briefly, posted, We are so proud and impressed, on a stinking FB page, I do not use FB, etc. Immune Response. I like what Chris Yeh said about the (phrase/declaration), Im proud of you, Here are other litmus tests I've blogged about. The rest were manual labourers. I had an experience where a friend, who I consider in every way my equal, noticed that I made a healthy food choice (not that I didnt before, but I think its the first time he noticed) and he said, Oh Im so proud of you!. We are probably trying to encourage our children, and even instil in them a sense of pride in their own achievements. Of course, the child may feel really pleased to hear this positive evaluation of their efforts. But, its important to remember that responding to Im proud of you with gratitude can help to boost your confidence and will help you to overcome your self-doubt. Can "me too" be used here? My sons grew up together and are spaced two years apart. stories on the Parent Skills website are posted only as opinion or ideas, and are general in nature. If you teach someone maths and they pass their exam same thing they are good because they have taken notice of your teaching. Hosted by Pressable. "I'm so proud of you" In this sentence, "proud" being translated to is absolutely right, and is also OK. The way you _____ is such a perfect addition for our family. William, however, was too proud and too obstinate to lend himself to such a course. Whatever influence we had on the person, or information we gave the person, what they did with it is their accomplishment not ours. Embrace Pride There are positive reasons to listen when someone says they are proud of you. Patricia Velasquez. I got into a conflice with her sons girlfriend because this young woman was working in a store behind the til and had made a gross error in punching out my cash register amounts on my bill and I had to go and confront her to get a refund as the store owed me about $50 due to her errors. Its just a colloquialism for way to go or awesome sauce or good for you! No one means to be condescending or imply they got you there in some way. They may start to see their parent as being insincere, or even manipulative. With teens and adults, saying "I'm proud of you" is a bit different. Yeah, If grandpa was here, he would have said the same. The next morning, I woke up to an email in my inbox that was one line: "I'm really proud of you." Yeah, this means a lot to me. The phrase, in my belief, implies my contribution as a parent. To me, to be proud of someone, you do not have to be above them in any way although that is usually the case ie older or more experienced (or snobbish if that is how you are) To me, you do have to have some connection with the person you are proud of. If its a long-term relationship, the mentor will genuinely care. Simply thanking them or hugging them is an immediate reaction to it. Better than nothing, Neil, but its sad, Mr. Rogers had to do what parents ought to be doing. It makes a difference I think. Might you quietly ask yourself Who was it that put in the hard hours to get a good report? I knew it, if no one was going to like this. How come you didnt come to watch this match? To reply to that right, here are the better and funny responses to I am proud of you from your bestie. Graduates: TBA, Grandparents: PET for Grandparents. A friend persevered in getting her masters degree after running into academic trouble as an undergrad. I live about 200 miles from the old college & she lives in the same town as the college is located. Marilyn, My life changed the day I heard Mr. Rogers tell me he liked me just the way I was. Oh, youre one of my trusted supporters! Sometimes people use it to appropriate the achievements of others, which is a sad and awful thing. You look so much better!". Kids also like to know that they invoke parental prideas long as it genuine! Taking a few deep breaths can help you focus. For me, this was a huge take-away moment. And John is left feeling confused and despondent. Can't you do something different?" But to be proud of them? 15. It remains condescending and arrogant. And you get to benefit from them regardless of the outcome of your relationship. However, is this what happens? To try to sum this up, I mrried and ended up in a small, isolated village filled with people who either did not graduate high school or barely achieved that level of schooling. Oh, thank you, friend. Congratulations on your graduation, dear son. "A proud man is always looking down on things and people; and, of course, as long as you are looking down, you cannot see something that is above you." - C.S Lewis 2. Language gets corrupted. How many people in your life can say, "I'm proud of you," and you take it fully and without any sort of resentment or dismissal? . For going back to work when Im still hardly sleeping, due to having an 8 week old at home? But arguing about what words mean is pointless- meanings vary. Never downplay the way you feel about someone's abilities and effort. I have a one year old boy and a two month old boy, and I had my first day back at work yesterday. Because this was someone elses idea. Fascinating post in two regards. Some years ago I attended a parenting seminar, where the speaker incidentally mentioned avoiding the phrase "Im proud of you". Although its worth taking a mental note of that in case a pattern does develop. It reaffirms the choice you made is good and right, nothing more. 4. 3. Positive reinforcement is a powerful tool that can help to encourage and motivate people. I have always struggled with this word. I dont care that I had to hear it from a video-taped personage. Love you so much. That would have shown so much more appreciation for what I do 24 hours a day, instead of a measely Im proud of you.. ), Partner: "I'm proud of you for landing that job", While you might understand that your partner is being supportive, might you also feel a bit miffed? Thank you all, too. 12. I teach high school. As parents, it's important to stay calm and resist the urge to blame our kids or anyone else, really for our emotions. I wasnt happy with this performance. Let them know how much better you feel now that you're smokefree. As a friend I want you to know that I am so proud of you. 2014, 2016, 2019. And Im so ashamed of you. And Ill encourage them to be proud. You certainly will. I am in awe of your talent and accomplishments. Narcissism can be a personality trait and a mental health disorder, and someone can have narcissistic tendencies without being labeled a "narcissist." When you live with narcissistic. Again, these phrases are my evaluation of my childs effort. 0. I do not believe that parents need to say "I'm proud of you" to show their support of, and their emotional connection to, their child. How Do I Tell Him I Like Him The Best Method (Proven), What Does It Mean When She Calls You Daddy, Im so glad that youre proud of me. 17. Imperfect, striving, playful, loving, learning. Living with a parents disapproval, or continually seeking a parents approval, is a life-long burden. You reject that person's generosity. Approval is a parent's judgement of a child's choices - and to a child, this feels like a judgement of them as a person. Someone else's pride in you does not usually translate to pride in yourself. ), Seven Thoughts to Help You Parent Peacefully, Hints on Maintaining a Harmonious Household. July 7, 2020 April 21, 2018 I may never know but you can simply ask him if you question the genuineness in his response. You: "I have so much to do and not sure how I am going to get it all done.". 1. Consider why you so are grateful for this thing or person. Great to hear this. Focus on this thing or person for a few minutes to get yourself into a more positive mindset. 2. Updated 7th September 2016; and 19th April 2019. said Christopher Robin. . No matter who they are, they all have one thing in common they make us feel loved. Proud" as praise - an external judgement of someone elses achievements. They note your hard work and dedication and remember the person you were before and admire the person you have become. 2. And now, that you have the other responses to I am proud of you, you can share the same based on whos saying this and after which event. I almost never tell anyone Im proud of them, for exactly this reason. Thank you for starting this. It can be something big or something small it doesnt matter, because the phrase is used to show their appreciation for your efforts and accomplishments. I have never regarded the word pride as implying that the one feeling it is somehow responsible for it. I'm so proud of you" I say things like "I love seeing you so happy with your work" and "I love seeing your words in print". The Obama campaign needs to walk this one back and pronto. Youre my friend, not my parents! You are using an out of date browser. And family can often be proud, but as with most things family, the obligation and bias dull the effect. If you feel stuck on getting that pride going or can't seem to identify the traits or qualities you're most proud of in yourself, go back in time. Who determines the meaning of words? I say it often to former students. This can help to create stronger relationships and can help to create a positive and constructive environment. It's important to remember that the power of words goes both ways. Don't remind them how far they've come. This mindset will help you achieve your goals, too. Youre the first person who is happy with it. After all, you were the one who put the effort into writing the report you did the research, you put the paper together. When someone says Im proud of you, first of all thanking them is the common response we usually have. 1. Listen to your inner wisdom, and make a note of the meaning that resonates with you. Thank you so much for this great compliment. B Blue Apple Senior Member I use the other terms like Im so happy for you. Compare: "Oh bear!" Thats why its important to take their words seriously and to respond in a meaningful way. Tell Them You Care. Tell me something else, Ive heard this at home. Its 10 years later, and I hope that, by now, you have told your children, if you mean it, that you are proud of them. After reading these posts, I think the following: a person will feel pride in anothers accomplishment when they feel deeply connected with the other. About 5 years ago, an ex college girlfriend and I began emailing each other occasionally (not often just once every 2-3 months or so). I'll help with whatever you need to make it . First, he is probably higher status / higher power. What Does It Mean When Someone Says I'm Proud Of You? The Mindset of the Ambitious Educational Elite, Thinking Clearly about a Persons Substance Amidst Stylistic Differences, On Intentionally Vague, Mystique-Infused Explanations of Talent, Book Notes: Lost & Found by Kathryn Shulz, Mindfulness of Consciousness Meditation Retreat. Move away from the source of your negative thoughts. She texted back that I make her smile and that shes proud of me. 27. Then there's emotional attraction. I believe many people do not understand and appreciate the expression Im proud FOR you. Initially this sit didnt sit well with me. (Of course, there are always people who try to suck up to youbut hopefully you can see through it!) Thank you so much! One of the most common phrases they use to express their feelings is Im proud of you.